Hey MWC Momma, Yay! It's part two of our interview series!. This momma has been a friend of mine for years, and I'm so excited to have gotten the opportunity to interview her. I love her energy and she has always been so supportive. i know you will all love her as much as I do. Here is MWC Momma, Shaina.
Name/ Occupation Shaina / Bartender How old are your kids? My daughter is 5 Are you a single momma, do you have a partner, a co-parent, do friends or family help, a mix of all of these, or other? Please explain. A mix of all lol. My daughters father and I have been together for almost 13 years but we are in the middle of a growth period and are currently co parenting at the moment. I have a very supportive family. My sisters and parents are all very hands on with her. Before you had kids, what ideas did you have about how you would be as a mother? I honestly didn’t have any! I think the most important thing I always wanted to be was actively present, to be able to provide genuine unconditional love and a very safe comfortable environment she can thrive and be her authentic self. What do you think is the most difficult part about being a mom? Making adult decisions lol. Like I can’t just make a decision for myself, it has to be in her best interest. I’m always afraid I’m going to make a decision I think is good for her but it ends up the opposite. But I just pray and give it to God at that point. What is the best part about being a mom? Omg everything!!!!! I can’t even explain!!!! Watching someone grow into themselves has been a mind blowing experience. Also, to receive and give unconditional love, it’s amazing. What are some hacks and tips that you use to make daily mom life easier? I hold myself accountable. If I feel I overreact to something, I make sure I explain to her that mommy is still learning and growing as well. I ALWAYS apologize. I never want her to feel like she is the cause of my displaced emotions at times. I explain it’s not her it’s the situation. I don’t have that “I’m the parent I right and I said so” mentality , I’m very transparent and honest with her. I also tell her it’s okay to feel things. So when she’s upset I allow her to feel those emotions, that way she’s able to communicate what it is or how she’s feeling. I feel that’s so important because I think children are taught to hide or quickly get over certain emotions as if it’s shameful to feel them. What are the most annoying daily tasks that you just wish you could make easier? How do you currently handle them? Cleaning up toys and slime. I handle it by making her play outside so I won’t have to clean haha! What things do you wish you knew before becoming a mom? I wish I knew that certain parts of parenting would unlock unresolved childhood trauma that you have within yourself. And that parenting is not just raising a child but also partially raising your inner child and healing those wounds. Also, I wish someone told me not to read those outdated mommy blogs! There’s no one size fit all method to raising a child, and a lot of those blogs have advice that is contributing to a new cycle of childhood trauma. How have the moms in your life shaped you and how you are as a mother? They showed me that everyone is pretty much winging it lol. Jk, but they’ve taught me how to be resilient. If there is a mom out there reading this that is struggling, what would you like to tell her? I would like to tell her to trust yourself. Follow your intuition. Don’t cry over spilled milk(unless it’s breast milk, then whewwww hunny I feel you). A situation can be resolved in like two seconds, but the way you react can stick with your child for a lifetime. Struggling doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong, it shows you’re working hard to do it right. It’s okay to feel defeated, you’re human. There’s a lesson in everything. Take breaks, don’t be so hard on yourself. Your goals are still achievable, there’s no deadline. Breathe!!!! Make time for yourself. Laugh more, it helps you stress less. Don’t be in such a rush for your child to reach “milestones” because other people children have reached them. Your children are child for a very very short time, savor every moment. Don’t put to much pressure on yourself to look the way you did before you had children, you’re not even the same woman. Embrace your journey, your growth and love your body you sexy goddess! It brought life into this world! Stay blessed.
Together we can become @momswhochilll